10 point plan to achieve a better relationship VIP plan
- Communication and Honesty
Make a pledge to be open and honest and to say things with kindness – if not wait until you can!
Thinking about the other person and performing selfless acts. Also surrendering the need to be right.
Taking the risk of looking silly. Being able to laugh at oneself. Cultivating a spirit of adventure.
- Respect and Friendship
Make time to do things together – foster a culture of mutual respect. To say good things about each other every day. (This is important to help the relationship stay young!). Trust in each other’s abilities.
- Quality Time
Set a time to do something every week! Come up with a set of non-negotiables e.g. badminton, table tennis, walking, bowling, sauna & steam, gym theatre, salsa, board games and watching DVDs as a family.
Change begins with me! So take the initiative to change - miracles are made. The only thing to fear is an unfulfilled life!
Be tolerant – pledge to talk about things when the dust settles to ensure things don’t fester beneath the surface. Don’t play the blame game – that way you can break negative cycles when discussing challenging issues. Be kind about the other’s shortcomings.
- Fun & Laughter
Find ways to keep your relationship light and fun – Always keep laughter in your hearts.
- Support & Encouragement
Encouraging each other wherever deficiencies exist, or there is a lack of motivation such as : with health & diet. Support each other in times of need – both empathy and sympathy are needed.
- Love & Commitment
Be more loving, tactile and harmonious with each other. Commitment means a degree of sacrifice for the other person. Love does not count what it does!
Made by the VIPs
AKA Valerie Stanley-Brooks and Patrick Brooks
Hope this helps you - it has helped us strenghen our relationship and continues to do so.
“Action may not always bring happiness, but there is no happiness without action”
Benjamin Disraeli (1804 - 1881)
The Breath Is Life's Teacher
Observe me, says the Breath, and learn to live effortlessly in the present moment.
Feel me, says the Breath, and feel the Ebb and Flow of Life.
Allow me, says the Breath, and I’ll sustain and nourish you, filling you with energy and cleansing you of tension and fatigue.
Move with me, says the Breath, and I’ll invite your soul to dance.
Make sounds with me and I shall teach your soul to sing.
Follow me, says the Breath, and I’ll lead you out to the farthest reaches of the Universe, and inward to the deepest parts of your inner world.
Notice, says the Breath, that I am as valuable to you coming or going… that every part of my cycle is as necessary as another… that after I’m released, I return again and again… that even after a long pause – moments when nothing seems to happen – eventually I am there.
Each time I come, says the Breath, I am a gift from Life. And yet you release me without regret… without suffering… without fear.
Notice how you take me in, invites the Breath. Is it with joy… with gratitude…? Do you take me in fully… invite me into all the inner spaces of your home? …Or carefully into just inside the door?
What places in you am I not allowed to nourish?
And notice, says the Breath, how you release me. Do you hold me prisoner in closed up places in the body? Is my release resisted… do you let me go reluctantly, or easily?
And are my waves of Breath, of Life, as gentle as a quiet sea, softly smoothing sandy stretches of yourself….? Or anxious, urgent, choppy waves…?
Or the crashing tumult of a stormy sea…?
And can you feel me as the link between your inner and outer worlds… feel me as Life’s exchange between the Universe and You?
The Universe breathes me into You… You send me back to the Universe. I am the flow of life between every single part and the Whole.
Your attitude to me, says the Breath, is your attitude to Life.
Welcome me… embrace me fully. Let me nourish you completely, then set me free.
Move with me, dance with me, sing with me, sigh with me… Love me. Trust me. Don’t try to control me.
I am the Breath.
Life is the Musician.
You are the flute.
And music – creativity – depends on all of us. You are not the Creator… nor the Creation.
We are all a part of the process of Creativity… You, Life, and me: the Breath.
"To a mind that is still the whole universe surrenders."
Chuang Tzu (369 - 286 BC)
I am writing to express my appreciation of your CD ‘the Path of Least Resistance’.
I am 54 years old and I lead a particularly energetic existence. I regularly swim, cycle and dance modern jive. Over recent years I have experienced considerable distress and anxiety due to my neighbours playing thumping baseline music disturbing my sleep and disrupting my lifestyle. Whenever I can I like to sleep in the afternoons and your CD helps me to relax and it has never failed to send me to sleep when I have needed to sleep. Your voice is particularly warm and comforting.
I would like to celebrate all elements of the entire process of this CD but I have never consciously heard it all the way through because I’m usually asleep shortly after it starts! I have many CD’s but this one I have played more than any other.
The Path of Least Resistance is the most useful CD that I have ever heard.
Easton, know that you have my gratitude and my love. If ever I can do anything to help you then I would like to do so. (You have always been so supportive of me).
Keep well my friend
Love from Paul Davenport
“The man who, having abandoned all desires, goes onward without attachments, free from selfishness and vanity attains peace.”
Bhagavad Gita (5th-2nd Century BC)
Where do I start??
I am writing this today, a different woman. I first heard of Reach through someone who had been going for a number of years to see Judith. I didn’t believe that even with Reach's help that I could get better, as I’d had depression and major anxiety for about a year before hand. I’d had enough of feeling how I did, and knew that this wasn’t the person I once was. A lot had gone on in my life but these feelings had come from the unknown and I didn’t like feeling how I did and thought I had no way of getting out of it.
I stopped going out and became a recluse, hiding from my friends, giving up my hobbies and becoming estranged from my family and myself. I didn’t know who I was anymore. After calling and calling Judith nervously, wondering what Reach was about, I received a voicemail message back saying I was welcome to go along, and after arranging a time and day, my first session was here.
I’ve never looked back! I can honestly say that without Judith’s help, patience, advice and care I probably wouldn’t be the person I am today. I wouldn’t have been able to find myself again! And after many hurdles and set backs I am still here and better than ever! Week by week I felt and realised I was getting better and better and those horrible, anxiety-ridden, life wrecking feelings were subsiding.
I got through self-harming, a bad break up with my ex-partner and coming out as being gay and so many other issues that had piled themselves onto me which had made me feel like this in the first place. Without the work I am doing, perseverance, dedication and enjoyment I wouldn’t feel how I do! HAPPY! I’m my own woman now. I’m still on the path of learning to love myself, though this has MAJORLY improved.
I’m no longer full of sadness and anxiety, I look forward to everyday of my life and I have found so many new things and joys about myself that I cherish! I am a completely different woman who has gone from hating herself and hiding from the world to enjoying my own company and being as flamboyant as I am!! :)
I’d like to thank Judith from the bottom of my heart for ALWAYS listening, no matter what; for always being a phone call away and for her complete honesty, love and warmth.
“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act but a habit.”
Aristotle (384BC – 322BC)
My journey with Reach has been like a beautiful romance that has lived up to everything it promised. The idea of falling in love with oneself seemed alien to me - new age nonsense to be frank. I now find myself eating humble pie. I have learned over the last year that to love oneself is not only possible but is absolutely necessary. I now feel I have some of the tools to sustain this romance. Who knows, I might even go on to find some one to share this with. For now I’m just enjoying the ride. Thank you, Easton – for keeping your word.
Steve B from Nottingham
“Let the beauty of what you love be what you do.”
Rumi (1207 – 1273)
Contributions Page introduction....
Reach began its unique way of working in 1990. Since that time we have touched literally thousands of people’s lives through our individual work, work with couples, families, groups and countless workshops. We have produced in that time 100s of written resources and over 30 audio and visual recordings and these have travelled across the world, largely driven by personal recommendation. They have also brought immeasurable change to many. On these pages is a snap-shot of what people have thought, felt and gained from their therapeutic contact with us via the various media we offer.
Also included on this page are some inspirational thoughts and writings from those clients, borne of their personal journeys with Reach. We've also added insightful quotes from some of the great minds both past and present.
We hope you too will be inspired....